walls are too thin

my neighbors are at it passionately tonight... and i have the absurd "luck" of overhearing every thrust and moan...
ugh. i know they've heard us too, or me sobbing in the afternoons sometimes. (the latter has been more frequent of late.)
i am both revolted and excited by hearing them. still i'm sitting in the basement, knowing i should be in bed trying to sleep before work tomorrow. instead i'm up and swirling with a mash of unfinished projects, uncomfortable desire, fatigue, longing, curiosity, and vague nausea.
seth is out late tonight, for the first time, with my bike too. it makes me uneasy not to hear from him. i know he's a little drunk, and i need to be able to ride my bike to work tomorrow.
but i'm trying not to be a killjoy. it's his first time out socializing with a potential friend since we moved here, and i want that for him very much. he needs a network as i do, and i worked quickly to build mine.

i feel very lucky to have found the people i did so soon. i have good friends here. friends who would help me laugh off the sounds of neighbors fucking, and tell me to take my tired brain to bed. even in this cozy apartment, with a dog who doesn't get enough attention, a kitchen sink that's too shallow, and walls that are too thin... and even though all that is somewhat temporary, i feel glad to be home. home at last.